Monday 2 May 2011

STRATEGIES FOR SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS

James 3:1 – 12

1.  My friends, not many of you should become teachers. As you know, we teachers will be judged with greater strictness than others.
2.  All of us often make mistakes. But if a person never makes a mistake in what he says, he is perfect and is also able to control his whole being.
3.  We put a bit into the mouth of a horse to make it obey us and we are able to make it go where we want.
4. or think of a ship: big as it is and driven by such strong winds, it can be steered by a very small rudder, and it goes wherever the pilot wants it to go.
5.  So it is with the tongue: small as it is, it can boast about great things. Just think how large a forest can be set on fire by a tiny flame!
6.  And the tongue is like a fire. It is a world of wrong, occupying its place in our bodies and spreading evil through our whole being. It sets on fire the entire course of our existence with the fire that comes to it from hell itself.
7.  We humans are able to tame and have tamed all other creatures---wild animals and birds, reptiles and fish.
8.  But no one has ever been able to tame the tongue. It is evil and uncontrollable, full of deadly poison.
9.  We use it to give thanks to our Lord and Father and also to curse other people, who are created in the likeness of God.
10. Words of thanksgiving and cursing pour out from the same mouth. My friends, this should not happen!
11.  No spring of water pours out sweet water and bitter water from the same opening.
12.  A fig tree, my friends, cannot bear olives; a grapevine cannot bear figs, nor can a salty spring produce sweet water.

Ever wonder why some people have tons of friends and seem to be able to make any relationship a great one?  It’s probably because they’ve learned the secrets of relationship strategies.  The truth is, Jesus knew the art of good relationships, and he wants us to have solid relationships too.  So let’s look at a few strategies that will help us do that.
The Power of Words.  If you’ve ever said anything you immediately wished you hadn’t, you know the power of thoughtless words.  They can crush, demean, and intimidate in a matter of seconds, can’t they?  On the other hand, positive words can affirm, encourage, and motivate.  People who have good relationships know the power of their words.  They have realized those around them can never receive too much encouragement.  Think about it:  Have you ever grown tired of someone affirming you?  We love positive affirmation!
We’re warned in James 3:1 about the power of words.  We’re told that not many of us should be teachers – or people who give instruction – simply because of the potential damage we’re able to do with our words.
People all around you are dying for encouragement.  If you truly desire to have good relationships with others, you’ll learn how to become a genuine encourager.  Why is it sometimes difficult to encourage others?
1.        Because of intimacy.  To affirm those around you requires an intimate exchange of words.  Often times our own personal insecurity keeps our mouth shut.  What will he think if I affirm him?  I don’t feel good enough about myself to encourage someone else.  If I try to encourage her, I’ll come off sounding stupid.  All of these thoughts often invade our minds.
2.       Because of inability.  Are you harbouring anger in your life?  If so, it will be tough to encourage others.  Think about it:  What comes to your mouth reveals what’s in your heart.  As God to help you resolve any anger and bitterness you may be holding inside.
If you’ve been encouraged by someone, you know the results genuine affirmation can produce.  First, affirmation brings change into a life.  What an amazing challenge – to be able to build someone’s self-esteem and change his or her life by your encouraging words!  Second, affirmation brings confidence.  ‘I believe in you’ are four extremely powerful words!  Use them to make a positive difference.  Exercise them to provoke change.
Matthew 12:35 ‘A good person brings good things out of a treasure of good things; a bad person brings bad things out of a treasure of bad things.’
Matt 12:35 ‘ A jó ember az õ szívének jó kincseibõl hozza elõ a jókat; és a gonosz ember az õ szívének gonosz kincseibõl hozza elõ a gonoszokat.’ (HKB)

God Bless!
(Susie Shellenberger)

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